I feel like I’m always explaining my absence. So I’ll stop apologizing for being so hesitant to post, because frankly, you get what you get with me and that’s pretty much the way things have always been.
But in all seriousness….”Where have I been?”
To summarize: Very sick.
I’ve developed some issues with my liver. This has me unable to do a lot of the physical things that I’ve gotten used to doing, and I don’t really trust myself and the body I’ve been given to take control. In addition, I’ve found myself in another vanilla relationship, for some unknown reason. Actually the reason isn’t that unclear. A combination of lust and love lead me here.
I wish I could say that I’m completely happy with the situation but as he’s very monogamous with quite a lot of jealousy, it’s just started to really interfere with my feelings of him. I am not someone that can count on soley the attentions of one person. My ideal would be two male partners, one of whom I’m quite sexual with, and the other who is mostly chaste. An ideal that I really didn’t think would be such a huge problem with as many men as it has been. It’s not like I want to fuck someone else, just torture his cock and balls and ream his ass with a strap-on while he’s locked up for someone unknown time frame with no idea of future release dates.
How can anyone suggest the jealousy factor of this?
To be fair, I am an emotional person, who is very needy. I’m unhappy not getting attention. I’m even more unhappy having no outlet for my voyeurism. And control. And animalistic needs to fuck someone with a giant cock in every possible hole I can slam it into.
Given the discomfort internally of regular sex, I would think that outlet would do a lot of good right now, but instead I’m left with thoughts in my head that I can’t discuss or be open about without causing ‘issues’. I hate causing issues…really. But it always seems to happen in the end anyways.
Lady Emmalyn's Weblog 
frictionman
/ July 29, 2014“It’s not like I want to fuck someone else, just torture his cock and balls and ream his ass with a strap-on while he’s locked up for someone unknown time frame with no idea of future release dates.”
I’ve craved exactly this for a very very long time. It’s very hard to find a woman who’s not afraid to take control in such a manner however. From some of the locations you mentioned in your blog posts, I might be nearby. I’d love to talk, even if nothing comes out of it. I go by the alias frictionman on fetlife, but you can also email me to frictionman@hotmail.com.
-frictionman